Week Nine
Last Week: 3-0-0 (dingdingdingdingdingdingdingding)
Season: 10-8-3
Before I start I have to apologize for talking about Ashley Olsen’s testicle(s) on the show today. Being molested by Lance Armstrong is bad enough without me bringing up her anatomy and for that I am sorry.
After Pizza Chris, Big Carrot and I celebrated Nelly’s 33rd birthday last night with some bubbly I started to recall my hip hop days before I crossed over into modeling underwear around the globe. I still have enough rap cassettes to fill a bait tub but tapes have no place in this digital world. Anywho, for Nix Pix today I’m going to decode the Wu Tang Clan names of key NFL players in my match-ups and use them to win another three games.
New England -5.5 @ Indianapolis
Yes, I said it on the air and I’ll say it again. I’m taking the Patriots by 10. Tom Brady, known to the Shaolin Monks as Tha Lonely Donkey Kong, has made monkeys out for the competition. They have been waiting all off season and half of this one for this AFC Championship rematch. Indy’s Manning to Wayne (Victorian Cow to Illegitimate Muslim Fundamentalist) will have trouble inside the eleven chambers of the Pats defense.
Nick’s Pick: PATRIOTS
Dallas -3 @ Philadelphia
The Cowboys had a bye week and before that lost to the Tha Lonely Donkey Kong so Vegas has already forgotten how dominating they’ve been this season. Tony Romo, or Erratic Assassin as he’s known on the streets, will destroy the Eagles like Bruce Lee taking out mannequins in JC Penney. Erratic? More like pinpoint. Maybe that contract extension will get to his head. Cash Rules Everything Around Me. Somehow I don’t think the name generator is 100% Wu accurate. In case you wondered, Dubious Masturbatah-X is T.O. Clifford Kay is Sheepish Lord of Chaos. My Streams of Wu-ness style is almost unreadable to the untrained eye but my skillz are undeniable and fresh.
Nick’s Pick: COWBOYS
Green Bay @ Kansas City -2.5
Temporary Spastic (LJ) is on my fantasy team but his team has done little to impress me. The old master Brett Favre is in full black belt mode right now and I wouldn’t want to cross paths with the Packers. OMG! Favre and Romo have the EXACT SAME WU NAME! It is 100%. Protect ya neck.
Nick’s Pick: PACKERS
Odds based on lines from Yahoo Sports
Last Week: 3-0-0 (dingdingdingdingdingdingdingding)
Season: 10-8-3
Before I start I have to apologize for talking about Ashley Olsen’s testicle(s) on the show today. Being molested by Lance Armstrong is bad enough without me bringing up her anatomy and for that I am sorry.
After Pizza Chris, Big Carrot and I celebrated Nelly’s 33rd birthday last night with some bubbly I started to recall my hip hop days before I crossed over into modeling underwear around the globe. I still have enough rap cassettes to fill a bait tub but tapes have no place in this digital world. Anywho, for Nix Pix today I’m going to decode the Wu Tang Clan names of key NFL players in my match-ups and use them to win another three games.
New England -5.5 @ Indianapolis
Yes, I said it on the air and I’ll say it again. I’m taking the Patriots by 10. Tom Brady, known to the Shaolin Monks as Tha Lonely Donkey Kong, has made monkeys out for the competition. They have been waiting all off season and half of this one for this AFC Championship rematch. Indy’s Manning to Wayne (Victorian Cow to Illegitimate Muslim Fundamentalist) will have trouble inside the eleven chambers of the Pats defense.
Nick’s Pick: PATRIOTS
Dallas -3 @ Philadelphia
The Cowboys had a bye week and before that lost to the Tha Lonely Donkey Kong so Vegas has already forgotten how dominating they’ve been this season. Tony Romo, or Erratic Assassin as he’s known on the streets, will destroy the Eagles like Bruce Lee taking out mannequins in JC Penney. Erratic? More like pinpoint. Maybe that contract extension will get to his head. Cash Rules Everything Around Me. Somehow I don’t think the name generator is 100% Wu accurate. In case you wondered, Dubious Masturbatah-X is T.O. Clifford Kay is Sheepish Lord of Chaos. My Streams of Wu-ness style is almost unreadable to the untrained eye but my skillz are undeniable and fresh.
Nick’s Pick: COWBOYS
Green Bay @ Kansas City -2.5
Temporary Spastic (LJ) is on my fantasy team but his team has done little to impress me. The old master Brett Favre is in full black belt mode right now and I wouldn’t want to cross paths with the Packers. OMG! Favre and Romo have the EXACT SAME WU NAME! It is 100%. Protect ya neck.
Nick’s Pick: PACKERS
Odds based on lines from Yahoo Sports
